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Tweaking, Trashing, or Keeping: Navigating Wedding Traditions

When it comes to weddings, tradition often dictates the script.

But in today's world, more couples are rewriting the rules to reflect their vision and personalities. 


Let’s talk about a few wedding traditions and how you can tailor them to suit your vision.

Moody Wedding, Boho Wedding, Wedding Traditions
Boho Moody Wedding

Wedding Party: Breaking Gender Norms and Embracing Diversity

Are you bored of hearing - "All Bridesmaids must be female and wear the same dress"


A lot of Brides do continue this tradition as they can sense that it makes the bridesmaids feel special, important and instantly recognisable as someone in the wedding party.


But some Brides are challenging this by firstly, having men in the group - which we love! As we all have that one male friend who is more desperate to be part of getting ready with the ladies than the lads. Especially when he’s there for you and not so much the groom. 


But it's all about the dresses.

We’ve experienced a lot of weddings recently where the bridesmaids either wore the same colour dress, or just completely different; but still in keeping with the colour palette. 


So for an example: one of your bridesmaids might be in a long sleeve black number and another might be in a red halter. Or you can have different types of dresses but both are in the same colour - eg, black or red. This version is more often the case as it’s easier to manage plus, every lady has a different shape. I know for a fact that I wouldn’t be comfortable in a halter - not with my arms!


And of course this non-traditional element can also work for the groom - have your sisters wife in your groomsmen if she needs to be there.


The wedding party doesn’t need to stick to tradition. You should be surrounded by your best people at the start of your wedding day.

Moody Wedding, Boho Wedding, Wedding Traditions
Stunning Bride, Moody Bride, Flower Crown

Bouquet and Garter Toss: Revamping Old Customs or Binning the Idea?

I have not seen a bouquet toss in years, let alone a garter! These had such different meanings back in the day - that we just don’t celebrate anymore.


There also lies the price. We pay a fortune to have our bouquets made by our florists just the way we envisioned, therefore we want to keep them; preserve them. And we deserve to do that! Why do we need to toss it to some wanting lady looking for a bit of superstition?Although if you did want to toss your bouquet to all the non-married ladies, think about possibly using one of the bridesmaid bouquets instead.


Private Cake Cutting: Intimacy Over Spectacle!

Does everyone standing around looking at your cut your cake fill you with dread? Yup. You’re not alone. That’s why couples are now opting for cutting the cake privately. 


A private cake cutting in another room of the venue is a chance to get some really lovely intimate photos. And then it can be distributed amongst your guests if you don’t want to take it all home. 


Trust us, you do not want to take it all home. It’ll be the only thing you eat for weeks to make sure it’s devoured before going bad.



Gender-Specific Roles: Choosing Your Inner Circle Based on Connection

If your best friend is a woman - she should be your best man. 

Do not let tradition make you pick your next male relative if you’re not that close. No one cares if the Best Man is a Woman, nor does anyone care if the Maid of Honour is a Man.


This is the closest person to you, other than your future other half, and you’ll need them to help you organise and guide you with all the ideas and opinions in your head. 

Gold Charger Plates, Colours Tablescape, Bold Colour Wedding
Colourful Wedding Tablescape

Favours with a Personal Touch or Waste of Time?

I think the tradition of favours was introduced because the parents would usually pay for the weddings, and a wedding favour would be the couple's way of saying thank you for coming to the guests.


But you’ll find less and less parents paying for the whole sha-bang. So couples are now realising ‘Hey, we’re paying for you to come, feed you, supply you with champagne and a good night out - why are we giving you a gift?’ 


Of course a favour is still a great way to say that you appreciate the guest. But it’s also a way to introduce a little bit of yourself or the area. When I got married, I wanted to do favours as we pulled everyone up to Scotland as we love it there, and I wanted to give a Scottish gift for saying thank you for travelling all that way. 


Maybe something to think about as a couple, and what works for you and your budget. 



Seating: Embracing Inclusivity and Breaking Down Barriers

Don’t you absolutely love “Pick a Side You're Both Loved By The Groom & The Bride” signage!? We do too. 


Most couples now live together, meet each other's family and have more than likely been together for 5 years before getting married. You don’t need to separate the families. 


You’ll find that more and more couples aren’t inviting extended family members they don’t really talk to, or the whole office. Weddings these days are around 60 - 100 guests, meaning that there is a good chance that everyone has met everyone before!


Reserve the seating at the front for the people you want to catch in the corner of your eye - sure. But don’t panic about whether your mum or dad needs to be on the left hand side of the room! That’s a stress you just don’t need to create.



What Wedding Traditions will you keep?

I hope this little blog has helped you in deciding whether to Tweek, Trash or Keep some of these wedding traditions. Remember wedding planning, traditions serve as signposts, but they're not set in stone.

And please get in touch if you need help as weddings can be overwhelming.


Stef




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